Oct 24

Hello Friends! I have a confession to make. I have been wrestling with God over money, yes money. My husband and I are trying very hard to get out of debt. We have sacrificed for years and been quite aggressive with it. We were on a path to being debt free by the end of this year and then we were hit with thousands of dollars in repairs to our only vehicle. My husband and I have been believing God for this and it has completely knocked the wind out of our sails. As I have been praying I have felt less and less faith in my voice. I have felt abandoned by God and angry with Him all at the same time. So the real question that I must ask myself is, “Do you trust God?” Well, here is what I have come up with thus far.

First, what is my motive? Why do I want to be debt free? My husband and I will both tell you that our biggest reason for wanting to be debt free is that we believe that we can do more for the kingdom of God when we are no longer a slave to the world. We feel strongly that God does not delight in debt, but that if we are in debt we should pay it back in a timely manner. We believe that God’s word declares over His people that we are the head and not the tail, above and not beneath, the lender and not the borrower. (See Deuteronomy 28:12-14) In fact, we believe these things so strongly that we declare them over our family every day.

Second, has God been faithful up until now? The answer is unwaveringly yes! Every major hurdle my family has ever encountered has been met by God’s grace. It may not have always looked the way we had pictured in our finite minds, but He has always been faithful to His word and His promises to us. In fact, even when I really try to find even a single time when He wasn’t faithful, all I can come up with was, “Well, that didn’t go how I thought, but the goal was still accomplished.” God sees the beginning from the end, and His purposes are more than likely even greater than ours. I have noticed, in my walk with God, that I purpose something in my heart and He directs my steps. (See Proverbs 16:9) Why is that? I think it is because God has some work to do in my heart to prepare me for entering into the new reality that I am believing Him for. But what I have learned through the process is that God is faithful and that I am always a work in progress. Not only does He always get us there, but he does it in such a way that we are fully prepared to receive it! What a loving Father!

Third, where is my faith? Is my faith in our ability to get out of debt or in God’s faithfulness to get us there? Hmmmm….. I think the reason I have been struggling is because I put a cap and a time limit on this miracle. I really wanted it to be my way, in my timing, and by our sacrifices and hard work. We are discouraged because that was where we put our faith. I have been asking God for more faith lately, and He has shown me that I have a lot of faith, it is just misplaced. God does not want me to stop believing we are going to be debt free, He wants me to trust that He knows how to get us there in a way that will last. You see, I think in a way we need a heart change. We need to vanquish the poverty mentality and we need to realize that our financial blessings are not of our own doing. As long as we are trying to do this of our own power, we will reap the pride of it for years to come. However, if God renews our minds and changes our hearts regarding our financial situation, we will be prepared to receive the blessing when it finally arrives.

I think this is a lesson for me that goes beyond our financial situation and can be brought into any situation a married couple is facing. One thing I have come to know, the process is almost never pleasant, but it bears the most amazing fruit that lasts and lasts. It also has left us in a more humble position before our God, and has kept us trusting Him and feeling secure in His love and faithfulness. Do I trust God? I trust Him so much more than I will ever trust myself, because my sight is limited and my understanding is extraordinarily lacking until God reveals it in His perfect timing. So what is it that you are believing God for? Do you trust Him to get you there? I encourage you to look beyond your circumstances and consider what God is doing and why. It is entirely possible he is preparing your heart to receive it!

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